exhale

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recently, i had the opportunity to join some friends in a yoga class at hours before the sun rose, and one thing the instructor said stood out to me. “nothing left to do, nothing more to be.” it got me wondering how easily it is to get caught up in our tasks, our lives, even our own goals. always onto the next thing we have to get done, or in my case the next thing i want to become and fix. even in that place where i have time, the right atmosphere, and someone outside of myself telling me where to focus my attention i seem to draw back into my railroad mind. for a moment i was following her directions on where to move my body as merely a list of instructions, that i began to tune out the sound of her voice and instead indulge in my own thoughts and tasks once again. i established a cloud of judgment upon myself so large i was missing the point. she said that line and i clutched the present again. each inhale and exhale were just that. each exuberant movement i made after those words were intentional and there was truly nothing left to do. there was nothing left to be. my mind was cleansed from fixes and fulfillment. in moments when i find rest between the constant search for becoming something else, i am the most whole. i stand high and tall even when i appear to be walking alone into nothing, but i am not. nothing is good sometimes. nothing has the proficiency to become purification.

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